Clutch You might have experienced how your ride in motion comes to an erratic stop when you press the brakes without using the clutch first. Often, the stoppage might not have been so pleasant at all. The smooth modern day commute would not be possible if clutch were not in existence. In mechanical engineering, clutch is a machine member used to connect the driving shaft to a driven shaft for power transmission so that the driven shaft can be started or stopped at will, without bringing the driver shaft to a halt. The use of clutch is prominent in automobiles, where it is used to change gears without killing the engine. Clutch can be an equally useful tool to synchronize variable systems in our life as well. Have you ever had a hard time shifting your focus from one thing to another? Well, I struggle a lot.   Perhaps, it is the clutch that is missing from our lives. Clutch in human life is called cognitive shifting which is the ability to adapt our behavior and thoughts accordi...

Needs and Desires I recently had a hard time deciding whether or not to buy a motorbike, something I have always wanted to own. One moment it felt like I should definitely go for it, and the very next moment, it seemed obsolete. Yes, we all have been there when it comes to choosing between our wishes and needs. Often we mistake desires for our needs and end up losing the sense/sight of our priorities. It is therefore important to understand the definition of each. Needs are the desires that stimulate immediate action from us, which is usually involuntary.  About 40 to 60 percent of our daily activities are driven by needs, making it more of a habitual action. This is why we find it somewhat difficult when it comes to explaining about them. Needs are focused on the present or the instantaneous future and thus have a greater impact towards our wellbeing. Have you ever wondered how a basic everyday chore such as wearing neat clothes influences our mood? You might have experienced ...

  Kathmandu through My Eyes As I look outside from my window seat of the Kabhre-Kathamndu Nagar Bus, I see pavements of Jadibuti crowded with people dashing each other who wouldn’t hold on for a second to reach their destinations. There are some, like me, on the flyover not too far from the office of Herb Production and Processing Company, staring downwards and wondering where these people might disappear during the festivals or in times of pandemic like Covid-19. As usual I look at the digital display of time, temperature and Air Quality Index (AQI) of the major cities of the country placed in front of the office.  The AQI today reads slightly over 300 and I try to visualize more than10,000 lives lost to the poisoned air in Kathmandu alone and wonder why so many people accumulate here leaving everything behind.  I then ask myself the same question: why was I here, living a much more compromised life than what I could back in my hometown, Ilam. I then try to relate my...

Love From enjoying those late night heartwarming conversations to spending the night staring at the ceiling reflecting about ourselves, love has all got us there, sometime. Gaur Gopal Das, an engineer turned lifestyle coach elucidates love as a great blend of caring and daring, daring to stand up and accept the person completely regardless of their faults and shortcomings and caring to strive for the physical, emotional, spiritual welfare of the person whom we love. As a matter of fact, love is more about giving and less about expecting in other words it is an effort to love someone unconditionally. Love is to invest emotionally in to someone knowing that the rate of return is zero and the biggest disappointment is that there is no emotional insurance. It would not be an exaggeration to say that love brings with it, suffering. The Buddhism has suggested four elements of true love as: Maitri, Karuna, Mudita and Upekcha. As I finish explaining these elements, perhaps our perception o...

  What’s your excuse for doing things you shouldn’t be doing? “There is nothing so useless as doing efficiently what that which should not be done at all.” These words by Peter Drucker hit me hard when I realized I was doing what I want but not what I need, the different things in life. My initial reaction or an immediate justification to it was–Of course, this shouldn’t be done, but I’m doing it anyway and that’s a problem. What’s your excuse to the things you shouldn’t be doing? James Prochaska, professor of Clinical and Health Psychology at the University of Rhode Island has developed a model for the six stages of change we go through before we completely work through any problem as: Pre contemplation, contemplation, Preparation, Action, Maintenance and Recycling/Relapse. I’ll be discussing these stages in detail. Pre contemplation is the first state of change when you have accepted that there’s a problem but you aren’t thinking of its solution just yet. If you find yo...

Understanding Are you ever dissatisfied to that extent that your chest feels like you can’t take it anymore? That rush inside I could feel you, when you try your best but still can’t make someone understand. Understanding, according to the dictionary is an ability to understand something or someone. Simple may this definition sound, but is actually quite difficult to understand. Understanding is more than just being with someone on the same page, relating to what the other person is trying to convey. Understanding is more like walking in the other person’s shoes and looking things from his/her perspective.   It is someone’s honest efforts to listen at least for a moment, leaving behind the predetermined understanding they have about the matter. Well, everyone has an ability to understand but do you really feel understood? I guess only a few of us do. But quite contrarily, the one to whom you are trying to explain yourself feels that they understand you because they think they’r...

An Elastic Man Uff! Sighs someone at their backyard, after sitting there looking past through everything for an hour. Who knows what might they be thinking of or be going through? If you’ve encountered that someone, maybe he/she might be an elastic man. They might be someone loaded with hefty responsibilities and stresses or someone who is on a humble pursuit for happiness. “Don’t grow it’s a trap” Jettie quoted it beautifully, life was much happier back when we were kids I guess. With your parents to lean on and you not having to care for anything, life seemed easy and happy back then. But life happened, didn’t it? We had to grow, and unwillingly accept that we are adults if not at least kids anymore. If you’re in your early twenties certainly you must have realized that it’s hard to be an adult and even more to live up to it. Yes, it is responsibility as an adult that I’m talking about–one as a son or a daughter, a boyfriend or a girlfriend, a husband or a wife, a brother or ...